I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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