Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
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