the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
