I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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