just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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