Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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