If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
