do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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