so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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