I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
