Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
