so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm determined to sit on that face.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
