will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
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