You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
