Sry I called you an 8
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
