paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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