I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize