You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
YAS. BRING CRAB.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
