Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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