If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize