Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
