It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize