she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
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