If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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