I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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