i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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