Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
