dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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