Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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