you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
