if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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