If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
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