S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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