Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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