Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
