quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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