Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
