Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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