he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize