It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
