Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I think pants incapable of making pants work
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
