idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
