Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize