i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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