Non-Jews are for practice
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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