My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
