My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
