If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
So squirting runs in the family.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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