Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
