Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
